The Beginning of a Beautiful Animosity

The Beginning of a Beautiful Animosity (also referred to as Vil and Wevv, the beginning of the end of the Illuminati) was a promo written by Wevv Mang in June 2005. It was re-posted as part of The Nearly Complete Works of Wevv Mang - The PWA Years.

Promo
  3 Days Before the Villiano Trial 

'''Outside SoL’s office

''The door opens to the office and Wevv and Mr. Wang are being pushed out of the door, by Satisfaction, who is wearing the world’s smallest skirt and dress jacket.

Wevv: This isn’t over SoL! I warn you, I’ll lodge a complaint with International Authorities!

SoL: Thanks for coming Wevv! Now, I have to make a very important call!

Satisfaction: You heard The Man! He’s got calls to make! To Important people. Unlike you.

SoL: Hello Geico? I’d like ot save a bunch of money on my car insurance. Yes, I’ll hold.

''Satisfaction closes the door.

''Wevv stares at the door, which has a very smug Satisfaction standing in front of it, with her arms crossed. Wevv focuses his glare on Satisfaction. Wevv opens his mouth to say something, but instead turns away with a snarl. behind his back, Satisfaction makes the L sign and puts it on her forehead.

Wevv: Well Mr. Wang, I think that went very well. Indeed, I think that-What the?!

Voice: Watch where you’re going slick!

''Wevv looks around to see what he tripped over, and sees no one. He looks down, and sees Lou, in a three piece suit. Wevv looks shocked. But then he turns back to Satisfaction.

Wevv: My dear, I know you're a professional and take all comers, but shouldn’t you draw the somewhere? I mean, really! Children for crying out loud!

''Lou kicks Wevv in the shin. Wevv lets out a yell and hops back, into Mr. Wang who was charging ahead. Mr. Wang gets past Wevv and makes to grab Lou, who promptly kicks him in the shins as well. Now Mr. Wang and Wevv are hopping on one foot. Mr. Wang pulls out a nightstick and starts to charge Lou, ready for mayhem.

Voice: I wouldn’t do that if I were you. You’ll only make him angry and you wouldn’t like Lou when he’s angry.

Wevv: (In an evil hiss) Villiano!

Satisfaction: I’m sorry, but your appointment will have to wait. SoL has a very important call. He can;t be disturbed.

''Villiano looks past Wevv to Satisfaction.

Villiano: No problem. I got lots of time. Lou, hold down the fort will you? I’d like to have a word with my good friend Wevv, here.

''Vil puts his good arm on Wevv’s shoulder, and starts to lead him away from the front office. Wevv shakes off the arm like it was a viper and brushes down his suit jacket. He glares at Vil, but walks with him. They head for the door to the hallway.

Lou: So, we got some free time, sexy, and I got a bright shiny quarter, so how’d you like to earn it?

''An unnerved Satisfaction presses the intercom button.

Satisfaction: SooooLLL? You almost done with that call, honey?

''The door closes behind Vil, Wevv, and Mr. Wang, ending the surely provocative conversation between Lou and Satisfaction. In halls, Wevv walks beside Vil, though keeping his distance.

Wevv: So, Vil, how's the arm? I must say, the sound of when it pops is often keeps me awake at night.

Vil: Aw, Wevv, that’s sweet of you!

Wevv: Yes, I go to sleep with a big smile on my face. Enough pleasantries, what do you want? Maybe some legal advice? Though I’m sure as competent, HA! as Judge Joe Brown is, he’ll able to handle the intricacies of this case. It’s not petty burglary, or “he’s my baby’s daddy!” but I’m sure the similarities between such crimes and stealing a multimillion dollar company have more than a few things in common.

Vil: I think I got it under control Wevv. I merely wanted to wish you good luck in your match. Awfully brave of you to face the Illumanati. I thought for sure you were going to run to Pyro, after Juntci called me and said you barged into his office and demanded a Pyromania contract. But you surprised me Wevv.

Wevv: Well, it’s not like that’s hard to do. And your confidence in me is heart warming. But really, you didn’t see what the Illumanati were up to? I thought it was clear as day, but then again, you’re not me.

Vil: Thank god for that....But I’d be careful. You have a knack for making enemies. And bringing out the dark side of people.

Wevv: Ah, like you would know anything about that situation?

''Vil stops turns to look Wevv straight in the eyes. He holds our his injured shoulder.

Vil: Wouldn’t I? Be careful Wevv. I got no problem with you going after the Illumanati. Make my day. The more the merrier. But you have more than just them on your plate. This business with Sick Fixx and Norwegian Beast...

''Wevv stares at Vil. Vil smiles back at him.

Vil: I stay in touch.

''Wevv then smiles a megawatt smile of his own.

Wevv: Well, thanks Vil. I feel so much better now. Let’s shake on it!

''Vil sticks out his hand at the same time Wevv sticks out the opposite hand.

Wevv: Whoops! My mistake!

''Wevv slaps Vil in the injured shoulder.

Wevv: Maybe next time!

''Wevv and Mr. Wang start to walk away, as Vil gingerly holds his shoulder. But Vil isn't done yet.

Vil: So, I’ll tell Bob you said hi?

''Wevv stops dead in his tracks, his back still to Vil.

Wevv: Bob? Who’s Bob?

''Villiano just chuckles and fishes a cigar out of his front pocket. He lights it as he answers.

ViL: Wevv, Wevv, Wevv! After all the business Bob and have done over the years? I spoke to him just the other day. He asked me about that little “ambassadorship” you had. I told him I checked with my contacts down in Mexico. You know, my good friend Juan, the UN Envoy looked it over, and do you know what he said?

''Wevv turns to face Vil.

Wevv: No, what did he say? I’m dying to hear.

Vil: (through a cloud of smoke) He said he couldn’t understand a word of it. He was so puzzled, he checked with some of the signees of said document. Oddly enough, they weren’’t sure of it either. Japan flatly refused to answer any questions. Juan got the run around form the Germans. He never even made it to Switzerland, but then, you know what the Swiss are like.

''Wevv slowly walks back to Vil. Mr. Wang looms in the background over Wevv’s shoulder. Wevv starts to adjust Vil’s jacket, smiling coldly the whole time.

Wevv: Ah, my dear friend, you should be careful when you meddle in things beyond your understanding. I’ll let you in on a little secret. You see, even if the Illumanati and their ambulance chasing lawyer were to decipher the wording of the document in question, it really makes no difference. See, the burden of proof is not on ME to prove the validity of the position. It on them to prove it isn’t. Now I really must be going. Good luck in your case. I’d hate to see you loose, simply because the judge, was shall we say “persuaded” to rule in the Illumanti’s favor. Hostile take overs can be quite the lucrative business. I should know. It’s amazing what happens to a man when presented with huge piles of cash, something the Illumanati has in ready supply. It’s really a matter of knowing where to spend your money and how. But Good luck and take care Vil. I’d hate to see something terrible happen to you. And not be there to see it.

''Wevv turns and leaves hastily. Vil calls after him as he turns to head back to SoL’s office.

Vil: You too Wevv.

''As Vil opens the door a loud shriek can be heard. Vil Yells out as the door closes behind him.

Vil: LOU! Leave that girl alone! You know where she’s been!

''The door closes behind him, and the camera fades out.