Mini-Ultimate PWA Promo

The Mini-Ultimate PWA Promo was a promo written by Bloodrose on August 8, 2006, after the banning of the handler using illegal multiple aliases, Gavin Moss and Juan Pedro de la Rossa. After the Ultimate PWA Promo in which Bloodrose disposed of numerous released e-wrestlers who would not be apart of the Psychotic Wrestling Alliance (PWA), Bloodrose hosted a separate party for the two with invited guests Krimson Mask and Little Red Riding Hood, who were recent sign-ups.

Promo
  Just a couple days ago, PWA Management decided not to hire Gavin Moss and Juan Pedro de la Rossa, the Mexican Warrior, for falsifying legal documents, for testing positive for crack and PCP, and for being too damn annoying. So when they heard the news, they were none too pleased about it.

Gavin Moss: “You can’t do this to me! I am the Savior of the PWA!”

Mexican Warrior: “This is not fair! You people are a bunch of racists! Always holding the Mexican down!”

PWA Front Office guy: “We already have a Savior of the PWA; his name is White Falcon. Next time, go after a position not already filled. And as for us being racists, we didn’t hire you because you’re Mexican. We didn’t hire you because you’re too damn annoying. Thank you, have a nice day.”

However, fate, it seems, is not without its sense of irony.

PWA Front Office guy: “Oh, before you guys go, here’s a consolation prize. Two tickets to an exclusive party. Just think of it as a parting gift, you know, to show no hard feelings between us.”

He hands the two of them two gilded envelopes, blank on the outside. Gavin takes his cautiously and opens it up, while MW takes his and tears it up and throws the pieces into the Front Office guy’s face.

MW: “Stupid white man. I don’t want to go to some party as some consolation! You can take this invitation and shove it up your ass, punk! I’m destined to join the PWA and wrestle for my people!”

The Front Office guy looks down at the torn pieces of the invitation at his feet, then slowly looks up to MW.

Front Office guy: “You really shouldn’t have done that. He is a very generous person, and when he finds out that you tore up one of his invitations….”

MW: “Well, he can go fuck himself, too! Forget the PWA. It’s nothing but racists and anti-Mexicans around here. I’m outta here.” ::he leaves in a huff.::

Gavin takes out the invitation and reads it over.

“Dear sir or madam,

You are cordially invited to my manor for an enjoyable and entertaining evening of fine dining and pleasurable company. They all say that anything can happen at one of my parties. Let me tell you, they do. All your wildest dreams can come true here, and you don’t have to lose your shirt and all your money in the process, like they do in other places.

Please come to this location at 9 pm sharp, and do not be late. Formal attire optional.

We are having you for dinner and we wouldn’t want you to be late, now would we?

Sincerely,

Daniel F. Bloodrose, Esquire”

Gavin raises an eyebrow after reading the invitation, and shrugs.

Gavin: “Meh, whatever. A party’s a party. I just hope they have enough beer and hookers…. Hey thanks, boss. Maybe one day I’ll be back, and then I’ll prove to you and the PWA Management that I have what it takes to be in the PWA!”

Front Office guy: “Yeah, okay, whatever. Just don’t let the door hit you on the ass on the way out, pal.” ::he shuffles off::

Gavin shakes his head in disgust at the Front Office guy, but he leaves.

The Front Office guy gets back to his desk, picks up the phone, and dials a number. After a couple rings, someone on the other side picks up.

Front Office guy: “Hello, Mr. Bloodrose? I’m fine, and yourself? Cool. Hey, I’m sorry to bother you but….”

a day later...

Night descends on the world. A full moon, partially obscured by the clouds, hangs brightly in the sky, its rays still illuminating the darkness with his eerie glow. A car drives down a quiet and lonely stretch of road. It’s Gavin Moss, and he is driving to Bloodrose’s manor. He’s got the radio playing in the car on full blast, to shatter any silence in the surrounding countryside. Oddly enough, “Dracula” by Iced Earth is playing….

After what seems like hours of driving, Gavin finally gets to his destination, Bloodrose Manor. He parks his car and, with invitation in hand, he walks up to the front door and knocks. The door opens a couple seconds later; it opens up to reveal Violet, dressed in a sexy purple evening gown, revealing her bare shoulders and her upper cleavage.

Violet: “Good evening. You must be Gavin Moss. Welcome to Bloodrose Manor. I trust you found your way here with little trouble?”

Gavin’s jaw drops to the ground, but he quickly picks it back up.

Gavin: “Yes, yes I did. Er, I mean, found this place with little trouble, I mean. So yeah, I’m Gavin Moss. What’s your name, beautiful?”

Violet rolls her eyes at that comment

Violet: “My name is Violet, and flattery will get you nowhere.” ::her ruby red lips form a coy smile.:: “Please, come in. It’s a horrible night to have a curse, and we don’t want you out in the dark night any longer.”

she opens the door a little wider for him to enter. Gavin enters, and looks around the grand foyer as he steps inside. His jaw drops again as he sees the opulence within the grand foyer. Just then, he sees a woman in black descend from the stairs. She too is wearing an evening gown similar to Violet’s, but hers is black. She goes over to greet him, and extends her hand.

Midnight: “Ah, you must be Gavin Moss. I’ve heard so much about you! My name is Midnight. Tis a pleasure.”

Gavin looks at Midnight’s hand and, being the stupid, uncultured bastard that he is, shakes her hand.

Gavin: “Tis a pleasure too, Midnight.”

Midnight rolls her eyes at Violet, and snakes her hand out of Gavin’s grip. Just then, a flurry of knocks sound off at the door. Midnight goes over to the door and opens it slightly.

Red: “Hello? Hellllooooooo? Anyone home?”

Midnight opens the door wider and lets Little Red and Krimson Mask inside. Violet turns around and sees them enter.

Violet: “Ah! Our honored guests! Please, make yourselves at home. Midnight and I will fetch the host. Please, play nice….” ::Midnight and Violet leave, leaving Gavin with Krimson Mask and Little Red.::

Gavin: “What the hell is this, Halloween? Who invited you freaks?”

Red: “What is this Hello-ween? And Mr. Bloodrose invited us! He said something about a bath and heads. Do you think he’s talking about washing our hair? Because my hair feels kinda icky, and maybe one of the girls can do my hair, and I can do theirs, and we can do yours, and…”

Krimson Mask grunts.

Red: “Oh, and yours too, Krimmy. Maybe Mr. Bloodrose can do your hair too!”

Just then, Midnight and Violet descend down the stairs, being followed by Bloodrose with Scarlet on his arm. She looks none the worse for wear, and is wearing a beautiful red gown that shows off her voluptuous breasts, and also wearing a red veil over her face. They all reach the bottom of the stairs and Bloodrose, with Scarlet in tow, greets the three guests.

Bloodrose: “Greetings. I hope all is well.”

Red: “Hi, Mr. Bloodrose! Me and Krimmy are fine and dandy!”

Gavin: “Um…what did I get myself into?”

Bloodrose: “….so, if you’ll all follow me to the dining hall, we’ll begin dinner shortly.”

Bloodrose and Scarlet lead the way. Little Red and Krimson Mask follows close behind, while Midnight and Violet grab each of Gavin’s arms and forcibly escort him.

Violet: “Right this way, Mr. Moss.”

Midnight: “We wouldn’t want you missing dinner.”

Gavin: “Um, okay, ladies.”

They all get to the dining hall. There is a lavish spread already laid out on the massively long dining table, with many empty seats surrounding it. Little Red and Krimson Mask sit down together, while Gavin sits as far away as possible from them. Bloodrose sits at the head of the table, while the three sisters sit as close to him as possible.

Bloodrose: “And now, let the feast begin!”

he claps twice, and servers come out from the kitchen area, carrying silver platters. They each place a silver platter in front of each person, and open up the lid, revealing the same thing Bloodrose serves to his mortal guests….grilled salmon on bed of wild rice and steamed vegetables.

Bloodrose: “As my friend Morpheus would say, ‘What a horrible night to have the salmon.’”

he picks up a knife and starts carving up the salmon. Everyone else does the same, but Gavin looks around nervously. Bloodrose looks at him.

Bloodrose: “Something wrong, Mr. Moss?”

Gavin: “No…I’m just not hungry now.”

Bloodrose: “You sure? If you don’t eat now, then you won’t get dessert.”

Red: “I want dessert!”

Gavin: “...” ::he digs in into his dinner; it’s surprisingly tasty.::

Dinner goes by fairly quietly, except for Little Red’s occasional outbursts about fishies. Once dinner is done, the servers come back out and clear the platters from in front of the guests.::

Bloodrose: “Well, that was an excellent dinner, if I may say.”

Red: “Just like Mother used to make! Mother….” ::she looks away::

Bloodrose: “Well, if you still have room, here come dessert!”

he claps twice again, and a server carts out a huge cart. There is a large, human-sized platter on the cart, with a large lid covering it. The server carts the cart between where Bloodrose and Krimson Mark are sitting, and he unveils what’s underneath the lid.

it’s Mexican Warrior, stripped down to his unmentionables, bound and gagged. His eyes are looking around the room frantically. His eyes meet Gavin’s and Gavin’s eyes meet his. Both are filled with a mix of shock, horror, and fear. At this, Gavin jumps out of his chair and bolts for the door. Krimson Mask gets up slowly, unslings his axe from his back, and lobs it at Gavin’s head.

the axe flies through the air, singing a nameless tune, as the blade meets Gavin’s neck and cleanly severs it from his body. The head rolls onto the floor as the axe lodges into the wall, blood tricking down from the blade onto the floor. Little Red jumps from her seat and runs to Gavin’s decapitated head, sticks her hand up it, and pretends she's a ventriloquist. Krimson Mask gets up from his seat and lumbers toward the fallen body. He cups his hands in the bloodpool, takes a handful of blood, and smears it on his mask and pours some onto his face.

Bloodrose: “Well, that’s their dessert. Let’s have ours…”

Bloodrose and the sisters get up from their seats. Scarlet removes her veil, revealing some burnt flesh and scars on her pretty face. They surround the Mexican Warrior, bare their fangs and drive them deep into his tattooed flesh. His muffled screams can be barely heard through Little Red’s hideous joyous laughter, Krimson Mask’s grumbling, and the vampires’ growling and hissing, as we

fade to blood red ::