Ken Ryans

Ken Ryans is an American professional e-wrestler who competes for Lords of Pain Wrestling (LPW) under the Pyromania brand. Originally a discharged NAVY Seal that was hated by fans, he later joined The Misfits. He is a former LPW Television Champion.

Promo Formats
Originally, his promos were simply called "A Soldiers Tale". The new format naming convention has him starting the promo with My, depicting events that transpire. Examples are My Altered Reality or My Homecoming. Ken Ryans occasionally break the fourth wall and act as allegories to depict the state of wrestling, or subtle hints at the nature of e-fedding in general.

Family Members
So far, quite a number of the Ryans' family members have been revealed in promo form. These include:

Duncan Ryans - Ken's sadistic father. He was an alcoholic and beat their mother to death. He was revealed to have terminal cancer and asked Ken to sign his Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) forms, although whether Ken signed them was left ambiguous.

Jane Ryans - Ken's mother. Died from being beaten to death by Duncan Ryans.

Craig Ryans - Ken's younger brother. He is actually a crime lord and former manager of Vendetta Championship Wrestling.

Jennifer Ryans - Ken's younger sister. He has not seen her in over 20 years.

Jack Ryans - Ken's nephew. Competed in Global Impact Wrestling, and is an undercover FBI agent.

Early Life/Career
Ken was extremely successful academically in both his school and college courses. In school he went all state with professional wrestling, mostly out-wrestling his opponents because of scouting them properly. In an interview conducted while he was wrestling for the University of Wisconsin, he admitted that most of his success came from the fact that he suffered from “Low Latent Inhibition” a disease which almost certainly guaranteed insanity on lesser intellectual people. However, the fact that he could deal with this problem indicated that his IQ was far into the genius range. This is why he was so successful at scouting opponents and figuring out ways to rival their styles.

After finishing his college degrees, he was conducted into the NAVY Intelligence, where he worked for many years. However, due to reasons that are unknown he was “Honourably Discharged” from the NAVY. His attempt to appeal the decision was denied and thus he found himself unemployed. Because of his former background in Wrestling, he decided to go pro.

Lords of Pain Wrestling
Ken Ryans first made his debut on PWA Pyromania 9.4, where he was brought in as the militaristic enforcer for Robert Lillehammer's stable, the Lillehammer Administration.

He immediately made an impact upon his debut, taking out Trey Spruance, a member of a group called “The Misfits” who opposed Lillehammer’s regime. In a shocking move, he and one of the co-members of the Administration, Sockoman were put into a triple team match to decide the Number 1 contenders for the World Tag Team titles.

It was Ken’s debut match and things didn’t exactly go as planned. He and his partner lost the match to the Madcore Wrestling Alliance.

The Misfit Wars
At Inferno 10.1, Ken finally made his singles debut, against the returning Trey Spruance. Trey was looking for vengeance because of the injury he had suffered on the previous cycle from Ryans. After a beatdown, in which Ryans continually focused on Trey’s injured leg, the referee eventually stopped the match, fearing injury to Trey, and proclaimed Ryans the winner. Trey was not happy with the decision and insisted on a rematch.

At Inferno 10.2, the decision was made that a rematch would be given, based on the fact that Trey Spruance never submitted in the match. It was decided that the match would be a Submission only encounter. In a brutal classic, Ryans eventually locked in his “Pacific Ordeal” finisher, to make Trey tap out. Ryans then boasted about being “The Misfit Killer”, a name he insisted stemmed from the fact that he could defeat any Misfit there was.

General Manager Spectre decided to test Ken’s theory, placing him in a match against two Misfits, contested under Hardcore Rules. Clearly, Ryans was out of his element in the Hardcore environment and he had to face two of his rivals. He faced T.J. Rage and Trey Spruance in hardcore hell and although bloodied at the end of the match, successfully pinned Trey to win the LPW Television Championship.

At Inferno 10.4, Ken faced his toughest challenge to date, having to take on the Number 1 contender to the LPW International Heavyweight Championship, Drew “Headbanger” Michaels. Although the rookie Ryans put up a valiant fight, the experience of Headbanger prevailed and Ken suffered his first singles victory defeat.

Ken, outraged at his loss, decided to attempt to get his dignity back. After a proclamation from General Manager Spectre that at the Sacrament pay-per-view, Ken would be defending his title against 5 challengers and would be allowed to enter last as the champion’s advantage, he declined the proposition. He instead suggested that he be the first man to enter, to prove to the World that he deserved their respect. It was granted as such.

At Sacrament, Ken Ryans defended against the Misfit Trey Spruance, the legend King NPD, his partner Sockoman, the monsterous Innilock and the decorated superstar Styxx. Although the challenge was tough, Ken was able to eliminate every single man in the match. After the match though, as he was celebrating, the returning T.J. Rage attacked him and beat him down. Rage was visibly upset that he never “lost” his title, seeing as Ryans never pinned him or made him submit.

Ken Ryans was becoming ever more arrogant and confident, seeing as he believed himself an invincible champion. LPW management gave him a match against Mass Chaos, who was considered by many to be a fourth rate Misfit. In one of the closest matches ever seen in LPW, Mass Chaos managed to overcome Ryans to achieve his first ever singles title. Ryans wallowed in his defeat and many claimed his shining star had just been snuffed out. In particular, the rookie Thomas Sliddell badgered Ryans continuously with insults, and challenged him to a match.

Ken Ryans was eventually so overcome with anger that he agreed and at 11.2, he fought the young rookie. Near the end, he managed to lock in the Pacific Ordeal finisher, causing the rookie to tap out. This revitalized Ryans, and he decided that he wanted another shot at Mass Chaos. Management granted this at 11.3, in a non-title match. Ryans fought valiantly and overcame the blemish on his record by pinning Chaos in the final moments of the match. However, the ring announcer inadvertently called Chaos' name out as the winner, before quickly correcting his mistake. Ryans was infuriated, attacking everyone within lengths reach, before security escorted him out. The General Manager of Inferno, Spectre called out Ryans and told him that he was barred from competing until the Dead Reckoning PPV had passed. Ryans left, leaving a message that Spectre would be sorry. This led him to the second chapter of his tale, the Inferno and Insanity War.

The Inferno and Insanity Wars
Ken Ryans was nowhere to be seen at 11.4. Meanwhile, at Insanity's PPV Endgame, a hardcore scramble was taking place with one mystery entrant from Inferno taking place. A number of people speculated that this was Ryans. However, it was later revealed that Innilock, the deranged demon, was the entrant.

The match went through its twists and turns, until only the monsters Innilock and Crazy Ash Killa remained. A brutal battle was fought, but near the end, smoke grenades suddenly went off. As everyone was enveloped in smoke, Ken Ryans, wearing a gas mask, was lowered into the ring and nailed the Death Row DDT on C.A.K. He then helped Innilock throw the monster through a table, securing the win for the Inferno superstar. As the Insanity lockerroom emptied out to avenge the disgrace, Ryans, Sinferno and Innilock quickly escaped.

This was not the last to be seen from Ryans at PPV time, though. On Inferno, a dream match was happening. Jaro and Pen, two former champions from Pyromania and Schyzophrenia were battling it. Near the end of the match, Jaro grabbed brass knuckles, which the referee saw and tried to take away. With the distraction, Ken Ryans jumped into the ring and nailed Pen with a batton like object, annihilating him. Jaro continued to distract the referee until Ken Ryans had left and then walked over, pinning Pen with the heel of his boot for the 3 count. Later, it would be revealed that Ken Ryans had spent his time barred from competing devising the devious plan of sparking the Inferno vs Insanity wars.

At Inferno 12.1, Ken Ryans was approached by Robert Lillehammer, with the offer of starting up a new front for Ryans – The Ryans Administration. He accepted and then went on to win a Fatal Fourway later that night against some of Inferno’s Greatest rookies – For a shot at being in the Main Event team for Altered Reality. However, Pen came out and spoiled Ryans victory moments by attacking him post match.

At Inferno 12.2, Cynical took over management from Spectre and decided to book the two rookies Sean Jensen and Killswitch, the so-called ‘CanErican Express’ in a tag match against Ryans and Innilock. Ryans and Innilock won the match, brutalising the two. Later that night, Ryans, Innilock and Bryan Risk came out, interrupting Pen’s match with Keiran Halycon and totally decimated the Former World Heavyweight Champion. They effectively ended his career – and pronounced that they were the formation of a new stable – The Soldiers of Misfortune.

In wrestling

 * Finishing moves
 * Death Row DDT
 * Pacific Ordeal (Elevated Boston Crab)
 * Tribute to the Troops (Triple Fisherman suplex)


 * Theme music
 * "The One" by Rob Zombie

Championships and accomplishments

 * Lords of Pain Wrestling
 * LPW Television Championship
 * Inferno Seven Winner

Match history

 * &dagger;Promo score is a rating which ranges from 0.0 to 5.0, the latter being the highest. Promos are judged to determine the better promo between e-wrestling competitors.